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A Psychological Maturity Approach for Addressing Psychological Concerns

A Positive Alternative To The Mental Disorder Approach

Welcome to From Insults to Respect.

Regular readers of this blog know that I have become disenchanted with the mental disorder/mental illness/medical model for addressing psychological concerns (see, for example, HERE). Today I describe how this came about, along with my reasons for preferring a psychological maturity approach.

My Disenchantment With The Mental Disorder Model

Let’s begin with my early education as a psychologist. At first, I was quick to adopt the medical model for dealing with the types of concerns that lead people to seek psychological services. This was because I was incredibly impressed with the medical model for dealing with physical illnesses.

You see, when I was very young, I had seen films of polio victims stuck in iron lungs. My generation was the first to benefit from the vaccine Dr. Jonas Salk came up with to prevent these awful infections, and he was hailed as a “miracle worker.” Later, I hurt my leg in a football game and to my extreme distress, I couldn’t walk on it. The doctor I went to took an x-ray and saw I had broken my fibula. He put a cast on my leg, and three months later, I was starring on my high school baseball team with absolutely no pain. Grateful for preventing polio infections and healing my leg, coupled with the respect others in my community had for medical doctors, I had become primed to think that the same model would be helpful for psychological concerns.

Then, in the early part of my undergraduate psychology courses at Brooklyn College, the various psychological concerns were all described as various mental illnesses, psychopathologies, and mental disorders. At first, this seemed to make sense. But then, in more advanced courses, doubts began to emerge.

In the courses that taught principles of science, I began to see that the definition of “mental disorder” and the various types of “mental disorders” are seriously flawed. Studies were coming out indicating that doctors looking at the same data about a case did not reliably come up with the same diagnosis. When reliability is low, so too must be validity according to well established principles of statistics. Meanwhile, the chemical imbalance theory that had been viewed as support for the notion that these concerns were illnesses just like physical illnesses proved to be unsupported by the evidence. In courses on the history of psychology, I learned that utilizing the medical model for psychological concerns led to lobotomies, shock treatment, and drug treatments that, from my scientific literature review, convinced me that they resulted in far more harm than good.

To be clear, I recognized millions of people that received drug treatments for their mental health concerns reported they found them helpful, but I also found that millions of others came to the opposite conclusion. I began to wonder if there was an approach that would be less likely to have people end up feeling they were harmed.

Meanwhile, I learned that many psychologists and counselors who provide mental health services also recognize the flaws in the medical model approach. Although they don’t prescribe drugs as a treatment approach, to their dismay, in order to have a viable professional practice, they are required to utilize the same invalid medical jargon as drug prescribing doctors because insurance companies require for reimbursement a mental disorder “diagnoses.”

Given this educational background, I began a search for an alternative model for providing psychological services.

Discovering a Developmental Psychological Maturity Model

In one of my classes I began to learn about Abraham Maslow, who had recently been elected president of the American Psychological Association. Rather than treating people as a bag of mental disorder symptoms, he focussed on identifying people who exhibited the most mature aspects of life, and he looked to see how these developed. He referred to those at this highest developmental level as self-actualized.

Maslow’s approach focussed on this highest level of maturity, but at about this same time period, I began to come upon other researchers who described various aspects of psychological development as a process of going through four or five stages. In these models, higher stage functioning is viewed as “better” than lower in the long run.

After graduating with a masters degree and getting a job in which I was to address various psychological concerns, having this developmental model in mind proved enormously helpful. The two most common concerns that I addressed were depression and anxiety. From Maslow’s model, a major impediment to reaching the highest level of maturity is not having one’s basic needs met. So, in addition to providing a safe place for my clients to get emotional support, which is one basic need, I also focussed on coming up with my clients plans that can better achieve their other basic needs. For example, when seeing someone who was dealing with poverty, and therefore was insecure about food and shelter issues, we would work on a career development plan.

At the same time, many clients had difficulties fulfilling their love and belonging needs. When I explored this issue with them, it became clear that the way they handled criticism was a major hinderance. They would describe nasty, attacking interactions which left a bad state of affairs for both parties. These began with either someone criticizing them, or they criticizing others. Further discussions led me to understand that when they made mistakes they utilized the same nasty, attacking criticism style directed at themselves.

With the developmental stages model in mind, I developed a five stage model for handling these criticism situations; the higher the stage, the more mature the approach (see HERE, HERE and HERE). To find out how people perceived the five stages, I made a lot of TV shows with a variety of actors, each one depicting a scenario in which someone responded to criticism.

When I showed these videos to students in conflict resolution classes that I had been teaching, they rated the actors who displayed responses to criticism in a style consistent with the higher levels as more likable, respected, and mature.

When I described these stages to my counseling clients in a way that did not claim they represented an absolute truth, but was a starting point to think about these issues, I found that there was something about the stages that seemed to them plausible. And then, after a few practice sessions in which we would rehearse using the highest level, the feedback that I got from clients was very rewarding. Long standing flareups with family members and others often completely disappeared, and criticism situations changed from being nasty to playful fun, and a valued learning experience. Clients also reported that this increased the amount of respect they received from others, as well as their own self respect. This led me to feel I was on to something that might be better than the medical model approach for dealing with psychological concerns.

I then went on to study for my PhD at the University of Minnesota.

Dr. Sprinthall

There, one of my professors, Norman A. Sprinthall, published a paper in the American Psychologist that further validated my new way of thinking. It reviewed the research evidence demonstrating the value of reaching higher levels of maturity. Thus, Dr. Sprinthall wrote:

“By providing detailed information on the content and structure of the multiple domains of psychological development, contemporary theorists are filling in the gaps and advancing more accurate successive approximations to critical definitions of developmental stages and sequences.”

He then discussed several studies that found life skills and success after the completion of formal education are more closely related to psychological maturity than to scholastic aptitude or grade point achievement. For example, a Ford Foundation study followed for over 16 years a group of “at risk students” who had scholastic aptitude scores about 150 points below average for college students. Estimates of their psychological maturity by counselors and principals when these students were in high school were a more effective predictor of success than their academic record, not only for college itself, but also in the following years.

Finally, Dr. Sprinthall summarized six studies that provide support for the contention that certain education programs can be designed to successfully promote psychological maturity. In all of them, those in the experimental maturity promoting programs improved their level of psychological maturity; those who were not in these programs did not.

To be successful, Dr. Sprinthall argued, these programs must include a constant interplay between opportunities to learn some basic principles of psychological maturity, opportunities to apply the principles to one’s own actual, real world experiences, followed by readings to help illuminate the possible meanings of such experiences. More recent research suggests that certain narratives such as found in novels in which readers can identify with characters dealing with the types of situations requiring higher levels of maturity can also promote this type of development.

This body of research sometimes falls under the three headings of “emotional intelligence,” “social intelligence,” and “positive psychology.” When all three are taken together they cover much of the same ground as the more general concept of “psychological maturity.”

Given these findings, I found myself in recent years taking to heart something psychologist George A. Miller promoted in a classic 1969 paper. There he urged psychologists to give psychology away. What he meant by this was that elder psychologist professionals should create a new psychology that could be given away to the public. These professionals, he advocated, should select principles and practices that the public could use in their own behalf. He wanted a psychology not for the profession, not for the Library of Congress, and not for graduate student’s eyes only, but a psychology that everyone could use, a practical psychology that would help each person manage his or her own life with greater effectiveness and competence.

This blog, From Insults to Respect, aims to do exactly that. It is completely free, and I have been drawing on what I have found to be the most helpful principles and practices that, once learned, can be used by the average Joe or Jill in any way they might choose. Early posts, which can be retrieved by beginning HERE, introduce some basic ideas, and I then describe the following tentative description of psychological maturity:

Psychological maturity is “better” in the long run, it considers more variables, and represents more comprehensive cognitive problem solving. Individuals who tend to act at higher levels of psychological maturity can think more critically, logically, and scientifically while acting civilly to people with whom they disagree; they can graciously admit they are wrong when information comes in supporting such a conclusion; they welcome receiving criticism, respond without getting defensive, though they know it can be emotionally concerning for them; they are hesitant to provide uninvited criticism, only doing so when they can formulate it in a way that promises to be specific enough to be helpful, and they do so without insulting tones of voice or name calling; they can role-play and empathize with the emotions of a wide variety of human beings and can process moral dilemmas according to standards of democratic justice and the golden rule; they understand that melancholy and anxiety, rather than symptoms of mental disorders, are part of the natural process of addressing concerns about losses and fears; and they have the ability to puzzle through the tough problems of living, to take a stand, and yet to remain open to possible revisions and new information—thus demonstrating a capacity to make successive approximations toward more efficient, effective, economical, and beautiful accomplishments.

Such a description of maturity, in a general sort of way, can be a valuable aid to challenge each of us to begin to consider what psychological maturity means. It is not claimed that it is absolutely true for everyone and every conceivable situation. The paragraph is my personal best effort to summarize what respected theorists have written, and there is some preliminary evidence that it describes a type of functioning that is predictive of life success, and interventions can help to promote higher levels of functioning.

When, in my posts, I offer suggestions for dealing with specific types of situations, I aim to stay consistent with the summary, while providing additional details for handling such situations. In many of them, I describe a little assignment that provides an opportunity for readers to apply what they have just read to some event in their own personal life. Moreover, to get a deeper sense of handling specific situations, readers are encouraged to access my three novels (see HERE).

So, in conclusion, I invite readers to give this free approach a try.


Assignment: If you will, reread the paragraph in italics that describes, in summary form, psychological maturity, and then write a paragraph or two about how the various phrases in the description relate to your own way of dealing with life.


Some people will enjoy reading this blog by beginning with the first post and then moving forward to the next more recent one; then to the next one; and so on.  This permits readers to catch up on some ideas that were presented earlier and to move through all of the ideas in a systematic fashion to develop their emotional and social intelligence.  To begin at the very first post you can click HERE.

Improving Your Level Of Wisdom
Christmas and Altruism

About the Author

Jeffrey Rubin grew up in Brooklyn and received his PhD from the University of Minnesota. In his earlier life, he worked in clinical settings, schools, and a juvenile correctional facility. More recently, he authored three novels, A Hero Grows in Brooklyn, Fights in the Streets, Tears in the Sand, and Love, Sex, and Respect (information about these novels can be found at http://www.frominsultstorespect.com/novels/). Currently, he writes a blog titled “From Insults to Respect” that features suggestions for working through conflict, dealing with anger, and supporting respectful relationships.

10 Comments

  1. Roald Michel says:

    The time Maslow’s hierarchy of needs became popular, I had my doubts about hierarchies for a long time already. I thought there was more bad than good coming from it. In their wake are navigating superiority versus inferiority, us-versus-them, right versus wrong, good versus bad, etc.

    As time went on I became more and more convinced that humanity would be better off without hierarchies. That’s why I don’t like a hierarchical division when it comes to psychological maturity either. When I look at myself, my behavior depends on the person I’m dealing with and the situation we’re in. For example, if I see a man raping a woman, I’ll make sure that the guy ends up in an emergency room. To qualify me then as not very psychologically mature, I think is incorrect. Working in my practice with a suicidal client, this would be a completely different story. It’s like what is done by Kravists (people who practice Krav Maga when necessary). Getting out of a bad situation, that’s a Kravist’s only goal. This could mean, running away, killing a person, or something in between. None of these actions would be qualified as more mature or superior than any other.. No “better levels” of action at all.

    So, I’m not in favor of “higher levels” of functioning, but more of “different ways” of functioning. And if there were no levels at all, my “dream” would have come true 😊

    Re: The Golden Rule. The much-cited and acclaimed Golden Rule is only valuable when it comes to people with the same wishes. If not, better keep that rule in the closet. How so? Because how I would like to be treated, doesn’t necessarily mean that others would like to be treated likewise. Maybe they even would feel terrible and disgusted if I would act like that. I better find out the needs of the other person and then treat them like accordingly (platinum rule). Well, if I want to of course. One step further is finding out if the other person has needs he/she isn’t even aware of till now, and then act on it (double platinum rule).

    Two notes:
    1. My take on so called mental disorders you know already.
    2. If I’m accusing people of “childish” behavior, I’m condescending to children, and not very mature. I don’t know exactly why, but I just had to say this here. Must be the child in me 😈

    • Dr. Jeffrey Rubin says:

      Hi Roald,

      Thanks for your thoughtful critique. It is pretty clear to me that you come to this discussion with a set of personal values, which is a very human thing to do. Let me be clear that in reading over your comment, nothing you wrote seem to me immature.

      I personally entered into this discussion in the context of people seeking me out to address certain concerns. I had become dissatisfied with the mental illness approach and was seeking an alternative. At the same time, I had come to recognized that everyone who came for my assistance came with their own set of values, and one of their set of values related to their view that some people seem to them to be very mature, some less so, and others struck them as very immature. Additionally, they were somewhat dissatisfied with their own level of maturity when it came to how they were dealing with their particular concerns. So, we began with where the person seeking my services was at.

      I found that by introducing, in a general way and without long lectures, some ideas of those who had given a great deal of thought to the nature of this psychological maturity idea, it was helpful. I emphasized none of these theorists came to believe they had reached a point that their ideas were absolutely correct. They had merely reached a starting point to challenge people to think about how to describe the types of behavior patterns that most people view as more mature versus less mature.This process seemed to me helpful for clarifying one’s own values. Like you, I emphasized that these ideas depend on the person one is dealing with and the situation one is in. When the person I was working with and I, together, tried to apply these tentative ideas to their specific concerns, they found this helpful as judged from their rewarding feedback. So, I offer this approach to those who wish to give it a try, at no cost, as a way to give psychology away.

      With regards to your position on applying the “Golden Rule,” I don’t view it as inconsistent with the “Golden Rule.” This rule has one pausing to think how best to treat others. I think that you would like people to consider that you might not want to be treated like everyone else, instead that they first consider your needs and then act on that, so you therefore want to do likewise when you decide how to treat others. I think your approach makes a lot of sense.

      Thoughts?

      Jeff

  2. John Whyte says:

    Dr. Rubin, thanks for your latest thoughtful post. I was particularly interested in the Ford Foundation study that studied at risk youth for 16 years and their corresponding counselor results vs. academic grade point. I also found a lot of common ground on your final personal vision paragraph that talks about the importance of maturity and Emotional Intelligence. Thanks for your many years of insightful posts. Given the current climate of record breaking opioid addiction in the USA, I do believe your approach of trying all avenues before signing the slip to provide prerscription drugs is a sound one.

    • Dr. Jeffrey Rubin says:

      Hi John,

      Good to hear from you. It is always a great pleasure to hear from readers who find some value in my efforts. Much thanks. Also, I share your deeply held concern for all of those who have been caught up in the current wave of opioid addiction crisis. Based on pharmaceutical companies promotion of these drugs, so many medical doctors jumped on board to prescribe them for relatively minor problems and it fueled what the U.S. is currently going through.

      My Best, Jeff

  3. JSR says:

    Hi there. Thanks as always for the thoughtful explorations of some alternatives to the current mainstream views around labeling people with disorders.

    I like your view of looking at psychological maturity and emotional intelligence and seeing if we can help build people’s skill in these areas. Sadly there is very little education given to people around these things as we grow. I could definitely see emotional health class being a very valuable subject in school.

    2 areas that I have found very helpful with my own emotional health, intelligence, and maturity have been around learning the practice of self-compassion (practicing being kind and loving to myself even when I am struggling or make mistakes) and also the understanding that comes from Parts Psychology or Internal Family Systems that we are all made up of wounded and burdened parts of ourselves. I’ve found that learning to listen to these parts of myself and care for them has transformed my inner experience from feeling very anxious, at times depressed, and very hard on myself, to one of much more inner harmony. These modalities have taught me how to really care for myself when I’m struggling which in turn allows me to give much more care to my family and my clients.

    • Roald Michel says:

      Re: “…….. Parts Psychology or Internal Family Systems that we are all made up of wounded and burdened parts of ourselves.” Even though I have become accustomed to seeing all kinds of insights and methods being developed in mainstream psychology/therapy based on so-called traumas, disorders, and other debilitating things, I’m still surprised that this is happening. Maybe these developers are struggling with something themselves and not happy with themselves?

      That there are several mental “parts” residing in a person is a healthy and wonderful thing for me, and if those “parts” sometimes/often disagree, collide and have conflicting “interests”, then I find that thrilling and won’t get traumatized by it. On the contrary, it keeps me mentally alive.

      To tickle the established therapist world a little, I tell them I’m multipolar, and if I wasn’t I’d be deeply traumatized, condemned to live a colorless, anxious, and boring life 😈

      Short story from my practice. Many years ago, a young girl came to my door and tearfully told me that a psychiatrist had diagnosed her as bipolar. She was desperate and didn’t want to live anymore. I told her that the Earth was also bipolar, and if it wasn’t, we would all die. She looked at me in utter amazement, then laughed through her tears, hugged me, and danced ecstatically out the door. A great moment indeed 💗 She is still there, and is a very happy, loving, inspiring, and compassionate wife and mother.

      • Dr. Jeffrey Rubin says:

        Hi Roald,
        I like your short story and believe it provides an important message for us. Thanks for sharing it.
        Jeff

    • Dr. Jeffrey Rubin says:

      Thanks, JSR, for your comment. I agree with you that learning self compassion and some of the skills utilized in the Internal Family System approach can be very helpful and are consistent with a psychological maturity approach.
      My Best,
      Jeff

  4. JTW says:

    This dialog is very vibrant, instructive and consistent with the fact that we all have good days, bad days, wake up feeling happy, wake up angry and upset.

    Our past is always just underneath our primary level of consciousness and coupled with a valuable conscience will hopefully help us build character and determine right from wrong, and truth from fiction.

    Isn’t this just life and living ?? The idea that we always have to be happy and content is not consistent with life’s up and down journeys.

    As Sondheim said in the Song “Somewhere”, “Peace and quiet and open air” are worthy goals but difficult to attain on a regular basis given the disturbing polarity of our times and other major existential threats to humankind.

    Perhaps some time with “The Lord of the Rings” delivers many life lessons that have stood the test of time for over one hundred years.

    Gandalf- “All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”

    For some to profit and sow pain in the client from these normal swings seems to me a bit unfair.

  5. Dr. Jeffrey Rubin says:

    Hi JTW,

    Thanks for contributing to this vibrant dialog. I particularly like the way you connect your heartfelt feelings that come up for you when considering this topic with some powerful moments in song and film.

    Wishing for you a wonderful Christmas,
    Jeff

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